The Liquor Cabinet

So you’ve been drinking a fair amount of vino and hop in the car with your two young children. Pretty soon you see the cherries flashing in your rear view mirror and pull over. You’re drunk and you know it. Time to make a serious choice.

Do you:
A) Tell the cop you’ve had some wine and take the field sobriety test.
B) Politely decline a field sobriety test, breathalyzer or any other test and keep quiet until you get a lawyer cause you KNOW you’re drunk.
C) Hide your keys in your vagina and insist that you weren’t driving. Then proceed to swear at the cop when they ask you to take a field sobriety test until they arrest you, strip search you and find out exactly what you were hiding.

At a St. Patty’s day party this weekend I talked to a cop and a lawyer about this question. Both said option B is the best choice if you know you’re drunk. Now, I was a little hammered at the time, but I’m just about certain that nothing even CLOSE to option C was mentioned in our conversation. However, according to the Peterleemail that was the exact advice given to 38 year old Jennifer Lowery by a friend. Here’s how it went down:

“She was asked to produce the keys and disputes she had driven the vehicle and was searched,” added Mrs Jones.

She said this was followed by an “intimate search”, which she also called a “strip search”.

Mrs Jones said that although Lowery maintained she had not been driving, she admitted she had hidden the keys because a friend had told her you could not be charged without the keys.

So make a serious ‘note to self’ ladies… (car keys + vagina != no DUI).